random_mumblings

US of A

2006-09-12T07:33:00.000-07:00

Its been a good 2 months and yes, i have finally passed my basic course and have been streamed to my desired course.(transport transport!! yahoo!!!) Went back to singapore on the 20th july and for the next 1 month, it was nothing short of an eating frenzy with diff pple. Managed to catch up with most of my friends and even had a class(not primary but jc) chalet to boot! Too bad all good things must come to an end and it was back to work i go.

Currently on course in usa for 2 weeks. Everyday is simulator training and it is like going back to australia, with the f#$%ing that comes along with each flight. However, even though i am not doing too well, i know i will at the very least scrape through la(not ideal, but thats wad u get for not putting in effort). When i go back sg for the real flights, gotta put in more effort and hopefully perform better....dun wanna get f$#%ed for the entire duration of the course.

On the bright side, shopping down here is surprisingly good! Branded goods sold in those factory outlet shops are simply a steal and even a person like me(who doesn't really like shopping) has been shopping crazily whenever i have the chance!

Anyway, 2 more simulator trainings and i will be done in USA. Homeward bound once again! will be reaching at 1am on a sunday morning and i am seriously considering heading straight for supper once i leave my luggage at home! (bak chor mee...its been a cruel 2 weeks...) i am such a pig....lol

Countdown!

2006-07-11T06:16:00.000-07:00

alright! another sortie down and with 2 more flights tomolo, i am juz 7 flights away from salvation! the countdown has officially begun!! A predicted 6 more working days and it will be home sweet home!

21st....

2006-07-10T06:15:00.000-07:00

hmm....today i finally crossed the threshold and officially took my 1st steps towards adulthood..
actually was quite an anti-climax, was looking forward to this day since last month, because i initially thought that i could be back in singapore by then and at least celebrate it with my family and friends. But instead, i am still here sitting in front of my laptop with 10 more flights to go and praying none of my coursemates realise that it is my birthday(i still get the shivers when i think of that super wedgie they gave me the last time.....OUCH!)

well, at least the weekend was not that bad. we had our end of course dinner at this nice cosy japanese restaraunt(tsunami) with really nice ambience in a garden backdrop. the food was pretty not bad too, even managed to sample delicacies like wagyuu beef(although i must say it sure did not live up to my expectations) and ginger icecream(it didn't go down well with me but if the boss liked it then who am i to complain!) went to a casino after that and boy was that an eye opener, tried my luck at the jackpot machine and lost 25bucks! my coursemate with juz 1 dollar he managed to steadily win $80 on the machine next to me!(lucky bastard!!) the following nite we went to this strip club downtown and i had my 1st private lap dance. lol, the gal was pretty hot too! too bad i sorta zonked out a bit during the dance( i blame it on the 5 bottles of wine we had prior to coming to the club, not to mention the goondu who mistook our order for stellar beer into tequila shots!!) all in all, it was a pretty interesting weekend out in perth.

anyway, gotta cheer up and start studying again....tomolo is another working day and got a flight to prepare for! Cant wait to go back singapore! after tomolo it will be 9 more flights to go!!

Primary sch gathering anyone??

2006-06-15T04:56:00.000-07:00

Recently made 'contact' with a few long lost friends. The little chit chat, the catching up, really made my day! Have been thinking about organising a primary school class outing(almost 10 year anniversary liaoz), but only have the contacts of barely a handful of them. But still.....it would be great if the whole lot of us could meet up. It would sure be interesting, how the rest have fared, i bet like almost all of them will be in the midst of becoming doctors/lawyers/some other professional, being the smart asses they are!(i can still remember that i was close to the bottom in class during our PSLE and my score wasn't even that shabby!)

Shall try to contact a few pple and see if they are interested in having such a gathering, maybe can even invite our teachers(if we can still remember their names) and let them see the fruit of their labour 10 years ago. So if anybody from TAO NAN SCHOOL 6H(1997) reads this msg plz contact me!! any other help is appreciated!!

Nothing has changed......

2006-06-11T07:34:00.000-07:00

hmm...since the last post(a gd 5 months ago!!), nothing much has changed.
I am :
1. Still a pilot trainee
2. Still stuck in Australia
3. Still unsure of what i want in life
Last but definitely the most important one of all!!
4. Still SINGLE!!

In the pass 5 months, basically did nothing except fly and slack in base. I passed my GHT and IPT(though how i managed to pass remains a mystery even to me...). 2 of my coursemates have been streamed to the USA where they will be starting training on their new platform(helicopters!). Another 2 of my coursemates were attritted and have been sorely missed.

In another 2 months time, i will know wad platform i will be streamed too(pray that it is transport). After that, my future is more or less set, baring any major mishaps. Quite cool huh? I mean at a age where most pple are still schooling/serving ns. I already have a job that is quite stable and pays well!

But lets not look too far ahead, in another month's time, will be my final test flight, after that is home sweey home!! Oh ya, and i will finally get commissioned as an officer after being a stinky cadet for 2 bloody long years!

Bak chor mee, satay, roti prata, katong laksa, sambal stingray, goreng pisang, hokkien mee, wanton noodle and al l my other beloved singapore makan......I WILL BE BACK

New Year....

2006-01-11T07:46:00.000-08:00

Another year has passed...looking back, wad have i achieved and more importantly, do i have any regrets??

For achievements...
1. Going through ground school, i have really learned a lot..
2. I finally became a jet pilot(trainee) and even went SOLO(my proudest achievement in my short lifetime and propably one of my most unforgettable experience ever)
3. I made some new friends in the force
4. I felt that i made a difference in the lifes of those kids i met during voluntary work
5. I managed to stay in the air force and get my bonus!
6. I learned to really appreciate my family, especially my parents and aunts
7. I experienced my 1st wedgie(and thats another thing i wun forget easily) :)
8. I grew up......

For regrets.....
1. I did not put in enough effort in ground school and therefore only got average results
2. I am still uncertain of wad i really want(i thought that by now i will know if flying is really for me)
3. I lost contact with many friends from my school days(i dun hav a problem with making friends, it is keeping them close that i somehow cannot master)
4. I grew up......

I am confused......in the next month or so...i muz really decide wad i want to do with my life. For in the next month, i can either fail and come back singapore and go uni and maybe even SIA, or i can try my best and pass the last main choping block of the course. Worse, i feel like as though i dunno who can i talk to about my problems and who can really understand me. Ha...maybe i should really go and get a girlfriend, one whom i can talk to and relate to. Any kind soul reading this with good lobang muz contact me hor......i will be eternally grateful and might even kiss your foot!

Shall leave with a quote from this book i was reading..."When pple are kind, there is no such thing as a strangers, just a friend you have yet to make." Cant agree more......

Maxed OUT!!

2005-12-06T07:52:00.000-08:00

Flying involves multi-tasking most of the time and i muz admit that it is definitely not one of my strong points....

Today while landing off a circuit, a plane cut in front of my path above me without warning, even worse was when the tower addressed me and cleared me to land, that stupid guy actually thought it was him and happily went ahead..

Now imagine this, i am descending and am quite close to the ground, the guy is descending even faster and on a path that might lead to a close proximity, The tower is confused about who is where and is trying to sort us out and last but not least...the friendly instructor in the back seat is screaming his #$%^ing head off. Oh ya, while all these were happening, must not forget to fly the aircraft and scan the altimeter/vertical speed indicator/air speed indicator/Angle of bank indicator......

I was like totally maxed out man....information was flooding in but i was like oblivious to all of it, my mind was saturated and couldn't analyse the situation and make decisions properly(more like not at all)i kinda like went into a daze..... luckily for me....the instructor saved the day!!! No, he did not take over control...but he did $%^# me until i woke up and try to salvage the situation. phew......'

Oh ya, if everything goes according to plan and the stupid weather dun change for the worse, i should be going solo this friday.....scary man....especially since i am like still a noob at landing and not really confident of doing it yet. Hope the next few flights can give me the practise i need and let me gain some confidence in myself.....

Low Average....

2005-11-24T05:30:00.000-08:00

Passed my progress check.....achieved a low average score. Somehow, not really too dissappointed with the score, maybe cause i knew all along i was not that fantastic a pilot. But i also know i can do muc better....study more and mental fly more and i can at least be an average pilot! not a low average........

getting more and more tired as each day passes...cant wait for weekend and definitely cant wait for 16th december(base closure) to come. but b4 that, i still have 10 more flights to go and achieve my 1st SOLO flight(means for once no instructor behind me in the aft cockpit tearing my ass!!!)

hopefully i can at least last and not get chopped b4 my 1st solo. GIN GIN here i come!!

Emergencies......

2005-11-22T07:04:00.000-08:00

Man the plane we fly is really getting old and cranky.....in my last 8 flights..i have experience 3 emergencies....namely, aileron servo restriction, stabaliser trim failure and engine slow start. Even though these are minor emergencies.....they are starting to chip away the confidence i had in this plane.....

Just today, we had like 3~4 emergencies, of which one was an engine flameout(similar to a car engine stalling) in flight during a spin. Imagine you are upside down and slightly disoriented due to the spinnig aircraft, and now the engine dies on you!! If i was the pilot, i would totally freak out man. Luckily the instructor managed to recover the aircraft and nurse it back home. Maybe i should really considering getting more insurance coverage just in case :)

Oh ya, tomorrow gonna have my 1st assessment of flying skills after flying 9 sorties. Hope i dun do too badly and can progress to the next stage of flying. Gotta start studying and mental fly...wish me luck!!

Sluts...

2005-11-21T21:54:00.000-08:00

After a couple of beers and some 'deep' reflecting, my friends and i have concluded that we are sluts. And sad to say, even our instructors agree with us on this point. Why? You may wonder....but the answer is all so simple....

1.While flying, we almost never perform to our best unless there is an instructor behind fucking us, leading to them calling us sluts..."Must fuck then can perform"

2.After a horrible flight, we are always so eager to look for our instructor to "debrief"(if u call screaming ur head off and hurling vulgarities debriefing......) us. We are literally "asking to get fucked" after every flight every day.....

3.We just are..........

Random thoughts....

2005-11-20T01:21:00.000-08:00

Is it just me or is it the closer you are to achieving your dreams, the more u wonder about why did u even dream about it in the 1st place? I am halfway to achieving my dreams of being a pilot and yet everyday i wake up, dragging myself out of bed and dreading the day ahead. It is not the flying i dread(though the instructors here can really @#$%^ u upside down), but the other aspects of being a pilot that turns my feet and heart into lead.....

To people who are outside the system, a pilot trainee is like damn cool...get paid to fly, enjoy life, dun have to go through infantry training shit, and not to mention frequent overseas posting. But the effort we put in, the uncertainty we live with(wondering if the next flight would be our last shuld we fail to meet the standards), the fuckings we get for not being able to fly(if we are able to fly, we wouldn't be pilot trainees right!!.....if only the instructors can understand that point) and all the menials things we have to do to please our instructors, is something that they will never know.

But on the lighter side, in the past 1.5 years, i have had more then my fair share of interesting experiences. I have learned and went through so much more then a normal person serving NS would and i am very grateful for those experiences. The pay is also pretty not bad considering my age and i can afford to be slightly more extravagant and enjoy myself better. Not to mention the friends that i have made and the common interest in flying we have that allows us to share so many jokes that other pple wouldn't understand. So ya....whether i pass or fail, i will still be thankful to the airforce for giving me so much......

A recent conversation i had with an instructor recently
CPT xxx " To the outside world the relationship between us is trainer and trainee, but in real life, in the cockpit, its more like fucker and fuckee......."
Me "Yes Sir!"(wad else do u expect me to say.....)

2005-06-15T07:34:00.000-07:00

I'm BACK!

2005-06-15T06:11:00.000-07:00

Been a while since i lasted blogged....A lack of motivation to write further compounded by my ground school(which resulted in me having limited internet connectivity) were the main culprits behind my dissappearing act!

Anyway, ground school is over, marking an end to another phase of my training!! Must say that it has been quite some experience. Especially my APT(aviation physiological training) module which is damn cool! Did quite a few simulators, like G-FET, Centrifugde, Vertifudge and the Somatogyral Turntable.(The above mentioned all involve spinning u in the darkness juz to let u realize how over-rated our so called 'gut-feeling' is)

Departure for pearce has been brought forward to july(how the hell is my course gonna finish our medical and settle our admin stuff!!!!). Sianz....that means i have one less month to do the things i want to! diving, learning french, powerboating licence......hope to at least do one of the above b4 i fly off. And ya, gotta meet lots of my friends b4 i leave! just in case i managed to stay in australia for the full 10 months!

Lastly, shall leave with a quote i like: "Knowledge is knowing that the road is one-way. Wisdom is looking both ways anyway"

DeStressing.....

2005-04-01T07:58:00.000-08:00

Kaoz....started ground school recently....(something like theory lessons before you actually fly..)
the pace at which new topics and subjects are introduced is like damn crazy....my brain is like maxed out daily with new things that i have absolutely no understanding of but yet have to memorise! In the next 10days, gonna have 4 tests: air craft systems, airmanship(vaguely similar to air law), avionics and navigation! this time i sure die one!

i used to think of myself as something of a smart alec and that my laziness and irresponsibilty were the factors hampering me from doing well.. but with these new topics, i'm seriously starting to doubt my capacity.....

Was looking thru the stuff my seniors passed to us for us to study......1.31GB!!!!! OMG and there is like no big big program or video taking up most of the space!!! SIANZ.....actually wanted to start memorizing my checks...but after looking at the 35 pages of font 12 characters.....i was seriously intimidated.....

Have been doing some reflections in the past few weeks : " Do i really want to be a pilot? Do i think i can make it as a pilot? "

For the 1st part, i have thought and re-thought about it countless of times. the financial part of it is really attractive, and the fact you get to fly some high-performance jets is like a dream come true in a certain sense. and of course there is the prestige involved in being able to make it as a military pilot! But military life is definitely not my cup of tea, i detest waking up early, having to acknowledge someone juz because of his seniority in rank and not his abilities or person, and all the stupid restrictions the military places on you. Not to mention the fact that i would have to enter university at such a older age(almost 26!!). lol, i know that i have been given a chance that many people want and cant get. and to not give my best is like a slap in the face to them and the organisation. but, at the age of 20, u cant blame a guy for having second thoughs of a career that would last him a lifetime. i need to know right now if i want to be a pilot, if not i would be better of somewhere else..............

as for the 2nd part of my reflections, Honestly, i dun think i have wad it takes to be a pilot, multi-tasking is definitely not my forte...i seriously doubt i can fly/make radio calls/do checks/analyse the surroundings/do navigation(which includes some maths...)/respond to instructor f#$%ing all at the same time!! for the matter of fact, i dun even think i can fly properly in the 1st place!! i am lazy, irresponsible, cant memorize things for nuts. i get distracted to easily and tend to over-focus on certain things and neglect the others when i get anxious....all these are definitely not traits desirable in a normal person. much less a pilot trainee... The only thing i have going for me is my eyesight, and even that is starting to detioriate....The stress of just studying is already getting to me, cant imagine how am i going to cope when i start flying and studying..(no wonder they say that many fail not because they are not good pilots, but they cant take the stress or miss home..) 50%...this is the magical number. The projected amount of people that would pass my phase of the training....i dun see myself anywhere near the upper half of the course.(then again, i have never seen anyone else fly cept for myself and my instructors...)

Haiz...enough of the serious stuff and enough of the self-bashing i am giving myself...now to focus on the positive things!! i got my performance bonus today!! $500++!! hee!!! that is something to smile about ya??

Quote of the DAY!

2005-02-22T06:21:00.000-08:00

Be the CHANGE you want the world to be.....
An eye for an eye makes the world go blind...

-M. Ghandhi-

FUCKERS....

2005-02-19T21:28:00.000-08:00

Dun need to say anything.....saw this on my fren's blog.....damn traumatized over the video....
but for those who are seeing this, plz take the url and spread it around, i truly believe it produces the effect required to disuade pple from using fur products. (p.s. dun watch it if u think u cannot, this is really not meant for the not-so-strong)

http://my.so-net.net.tw/sirwang/fur.wmv

and for those who dun agree with me....i think it is high time u start looking for ur heart....

Com service

2005-02-19T05:43:00.000-08:00

today was the 1st time in almost a year that i did community service. felt good to be of use to the society again man! seeing those little kids really made my day and helping them out with their homework was just so fun!(if only i was juz as motivated when it came to my own work....) even managed to catch up with an old friend from secondary school who had also volunteered her service. i would love to do this kind of social work as my full-time job, to be a social worker!!...but knowing that my parents would be totally dissappointed with my choice, i shall strive instead to be like those senior volunteers who have been around for decades, whose helping hands has touched the lifes of so many. whom the students lovingly call "teacher".

i will put in my best when i am around them, helping them in wadeva i can. i want to be a big brother to whom they can look up to and love! hee....i have this wish...that is to work side by side with the current kids in ten years time...helping others like them.......wah....it will be like a dream come true!!!

New Year Resolution

2005-01-09T03:36:00.000-08:00

I know its quite late for me to be thinking about new year resolution, with the year already into its ninth day. but.....whos to stop me! hee.....so here are my new year resolutions!!

To cut down on unnessessary expenditure(like taxi rides etc...)
To stop being very late all the time and be more punctual(note..i did not state to be punctual as i knwo myself to well!! i only stated to be more punctual!)
To maintain my weight constant(note that i not am vain but my weight really fluactuated too much last year and i think that was the course of many of my illness last year)
To spend more time with my family members
To stop taking my frens for granted
To love my dog more( i feel that i have been neglecting it ever since i entered the armed forces)

I dun know if i will be able to abide by and achieve all my resolutions, but i do know that i will work hard towards them. So here's wishing everyone a HAPPY belated... NEW YEAR!!

Brunei....part 2

2005-01-08T09:51:00.000-08:00

Hee....been a long time since i last blogged...been too lazy to come up here and type
anyway....brunei was one hell of an experience(not that i have anyinclination to repeat that experience ever again!!!)Hmmm...except for those infantry officers who go through a extended(and therefore tougher) course. I doubt many in Singapore will truly understand what we went through. Sure it sounds simple. I mean wads starving 4 days in the jungle and spending a further 2 days hiking back to base camp. Unless u go throug it, its all just numbers to you! So do not belittle the experience that i have went through, for i believe i have came out from it a stronger man(even if i dun look like it). And for those infantry pple who went through the full jungle confidence course package or more....i salute u!

i learned a lot about myself as well as those around me whom i call my friends. The jungle, the hunger, the fatigue, it gets to you. It is only when the going gets tough that u can really see thru the facade, the hyprocrites(including urself) and all the selfish things people do. Must say that i was really dissappointed in some of my coursemates after hearing wad they did during the course of our training. Although i wasn't a saint myself, i can proudly say that at the very least, i did not betray anyone's trust, nor did i refuse to help anyone who required it. I put in effort in everything i did and managed to hit and even exceed the criteria given to us.!

So now, after finishing this phase of my training, i am looking forward to my next phase of training, which would be ground school, followed by more actual flying in australia! Although as of now i am still unsure of my future, i have decided that since i am here, i might as well do my best until i make up my mind!which i know will take some time...hee.....:+))

Brueni

2004-12-12T18:27:00.000-08:00

Going to join hy zq they all in the comforts of the jungle in brunei tomorrow. And as usual, i still have not packed my stuff even though i am left with less then 4 hours till book in. Sighz....... I am such a last minute worker!

Gonna go there and starve for 4 whole days! Now thats quite a lot to ask for from a guy who lives to eat and not eats to live. Hopefully i can catch some fish or something during my stay in the jungle....or else i can really go and die liaoz.......

Gtg liaoz...gotta really pack my bag now. Happy birthday in advance to pf, yy and yn!! wun have the chance to do so while in brunei.

Anger management

2004-12-12T13:11:00.000-08:00

Recently had an arguement with a platoonmate of mine during a game of soccer. Initially, i had wanted to just let the matter rest and thus apologised to him even though i felt that i wasn't in the wrong. I offered him a hand but he wasn't man enough to take it and he rejected my apology. Now that pissed me off!!

I decided that the best course of action was to do onto him wad my brother used to do to me when we were younger and to great effect too!! I smiled at that guy and simply walked off looking . Now you may ask how can this course of action have such an effect??? this is my explaination. On one hand, you emerge as the good guy. people praise you for your good temper and tolerance as well as gentlemenliness in giving in to others. On the other hand, i have learnt long ago that wad angers people more when they are already so worked up is when they see that they can get so easily affected by you whereas no matte what they do seems to have no effect on you.

You should have seen his face as i walked away from him. laughing(at his expense) together with the crowd around the court. I emerge from this incident smelling of roses, while he fell flat on his face. I had friends coming up to me praising me for my ability to control my temper and for being so calm.

Lol, i am such a hypocritical guy! but then again in this world who isnt??

Monkey business.....

2004-12-10T16:12:00.000-08:00

Lots of things happen in the past 2 weeks. Highlights include:

1. A stupid monkey stole my lunch during an outfield exercise!( As though not having lunch is bad, imagine having to be confined because i lost it in a nature reserve!!!) That stupid monkey even combat ration(the disgusting green little packets which almost all ns guys hates!) also want! I hope it gets servere diahorrea from eating all those combat rations man!

2. Bought a LAPTOP!! YEAH!! the specs is quite good, centrino dothan 1.7ghz core, 512 ram, 60 gig hdd with a ati 9700 128mb vram graphics card. Should be able to play most games reasonably well. Sad thing is....with all my money spent on this laptop, i got no more for my digicam and mp3 player.....

3. I got an A for my performance in OCS! lol, dun ask me how i got it! i myself also not sure. but quite pleased with myself as my platoon only had 4 others who got A also. Bad news is that i will be an appointment holder while in brunei......which means any saikang i also have to do and if instructors want to scold/punish anyone, i will be the 1st in line.....

Things i learnt from the army.....

2004-12-03T21:29:00.000-08:00

RSAF-------- Round Short aAnd Fat people
PHD -------- Poly Halfway Dropout

judging judges

2004-11-14T22:43:00.000-08:00

Was surfing thru the net when i came across this quote.

If you judge people, you have no time to love them!!
Author: Mother Teresa

I couldn't agree more with this statement, and i believe most pple too. but somehow, judging pple has become 2nd nature to all of us. Be it strangers, friends, or even family, we have at one point of time or another judged all of them. SAd aint it, we feel so insercure of ourself that we have to harp and play up other pple's deficiency in other to make ourself feel better.

Actually, who the hell do we think we are to judge others? are we so flawless, so perfect ourselves? we should leave the job of fault spotting to others more capable and qualified than us. Instead of finding faults in others, we should find certain characteristic we like about them and focus on it.

hmmm....dunno why i felt so strongly about this quote..can actually crap so much about it. anyway, this is just my 3 cents worth....if anyone thinks that wad i'm writing is incorrect or just plain rubbish, you are probably right! :p

Mango Upside Down Cake

2004-11-14T03:47:00.000-08:00

decided to bake mango cake today...had my aunt buy me a few mangoes while i shopped for the rest of the ingredients...it started out promisingly enough. the mangoes smelt great, the cake batter was just perfect! i could envision myself tucking in to a mouth watering mango cake in a few hours time
then things started going haywire....1st, my cake pan started leaking!! my batter was dripping all over the oven and even started burning! had to take out the cake and clean up the oven as quickly as i could before continue baking. 20min later, disaster struck again! my aunt, being slightly impatient checked on the cake and told me it was ok and ready to serve(even though it had been in the oven for only 30min, just half of the allocated timing the recipe instructed!!) i stupidly took out the cake and flipped it over. and viola!!! the cake collasped right before my very eyes! the batter in the middle of the cake was not yet cooked! the mango got screwed up!
sigh....everything that could go wrong went wrong.....

never mind..gonna have my revenge tomolo.....gonna bake another cake, and this time i will make sure it is done properly! I WILL HAVE MY CAKE!!!!!

Depavalli

2004-11-11T09:34:00.000-08:00

Argh......was about to finish writing my blog when my fren switched of the comp!! grr.....
anyway, i have come to realised that doing duty on weekend is not really that bad, especially if there is no instructors around and a air-conditioned recreational room with tv and internet...not to mention laptops to do some gaming!

sianz....something stupid is happening in my wing. there is a growing animosity between the pilot trainees and some other pple. this was highlighted recently when they announced who was supposed to do guard duty on depavalli and of the 12 names read out, 10 were pilot trainees(we make up approximately 40% of the cohort) and many of the pilot trainees immediately voiced out their displeasure.

NOt sure wad to feel...on one hand, quite glad that the group of us are banding together and looking out for one another. on the another hand, it is not worth it to disrupt the harmony of the company....aiya, hope that the bad feeling towards one another will end soon, or else it is gonna be a long 5 weeks ahead!

p/s : as a result of some bugger lossing his rifle in brunei, my jungle survival course is now delayed till next year(i get to lobo around again for close to a month and get paid doing nothing again!!!)....hopefully i can get some leave between and it is off i go on a holiday!!! hee....

Booking In

2004-11-07T18:12:00.000-08:00

Sianz...hate this time of the week......book in!
gotta book in at 9.30pm. worse of all, got a dental appt at 9am tomolo so i'm gonna book out the following day at 6.30am. lol, going all the way to jurong to sleep and eat breakfast.....stupid siaz....

anyway, saw this on a post card and thought it to be quite meaningful. "you can only know where you are going after you know where you have come from" hmmm.........

Air Wing

2004-11-07T01:30:00.000-08:00

After 1 loooong month in alpha wing, i finally moved into my beloved air wing. and boy was it a culture shock for me....the instructors suddenly stopped shouting at you, there is suddenly time for u to walk to a place, not run. And best of all, you get to bathe! not just letting a trinkle of water fall over ur body and coming out, but actually bathe slowly using soap and shampoo! we bathe so much in air wing, my friends and i literally ran out of underwear in 3 days!

Life in air wing has been one good news followed by another! i haven been able to stop smiling for the past week. it is damn slack nowadays. to give an example, one day, after our lecture, our captain came to us and told us that she had bad news. she said that due to time constraints, we would have to rush through lunch. looking at her watch, she told us we had till 1 o'clock to eat and get back to the lecture room. i was mentally prepared to go and had already started packing my bag furiously when suddenly, i noticed my watch. it was only 11:50!! 1hour and 10 min is considered a SHORT lunch?? OMG!!!

Physical coporal punishment is also a thing of the past. In fact, i dare say the punishment is almost a thing of the past too! man, i love the air force culture! this is the life for me man! Only thing that has dampened my mood........i got duty on depavali!!! sianz.....while the rest of singapore can go out have fun, i will be stuck in a stupid room wih nothing to do......hope my friend will be able to lend me his laptop when the time comes.......

Lonely

2004-10-31T17:43:00.001-08:00

do you ever feel so lonely? even though you have lots of friends, even good friends? i know i do...............

......

2004-10-31T01:16:00.000-08:00

Went out for dinner yesterday....Was supposed to be a happy one celebrating my mom's birthday, and it was, until my sister told me something halfway thru dinner. I was like so stunted that I did not know how to react appropriately to the news. In the end, I had to sorta force myself to smile thru the night...

wad was the news that shocked me so much? it was that my paternal aunt had breast cancer and had juz came back from operation(hopefully on the path to a full recovery). and you know wad? when i first got this infomation, the 1st thing i felt was not sadness/sympathy or even fear, rather, it was guilt that i felt. i felt guilty for not paying enough attention to her to realized that something is not right with her to begin with, felt guilty cause i did not always pay attention to wad she was saying to me, felt guilty cause i got angry with her at times even though it was of no fault of hers. and lastly, i felt guilty cause did not spent enough time with her, electing to go out with frens on the weekends when she made the trip all the way from the city to my home to visit.

you know wads funny? people always say that i'm a nice guy. but wad kind of nice guy i can be if i neglect and do not pay attention to the needs and well being of my relative, my loved one. why was i not around for her during troubled times?

well, all these is going to change from now on. i am going to cherish all those around me, i will pay extra attention to every detail about them, and most importantly of all, i will spend more time with them. My world shall not revolve around me. rather, it should revolve around them.the next time(touchwood!) if i hear any news about my loved ones, it will not be old news that are a few weeks old, and most importantly of all, i must not feel guilty even if they were seriously ill or even on the throes of death, for i know i had cherished and loved them to the best of my ability while i can.

Juz another day.....

2004-10-23T21:41:00.000-07:00

finally! for once in the past 22 days, i managed to sleep more then 7 hours at a go! boy did it feel great! love to juz lie on my bed and juz laze around for another half an hour or so before waking up properly for a good breakfast!

went to met up with my secondary school friends yesterday, felt great to know that although we din really keep in contact that much after going different places, the bond between us was still there... had a great time playing pool with them(even though i cant aim/shoot properly to save my nuts!) really miss my secondary school days, to me, they were the best years of my relatively short life. the things i learnt, the friends i made and the things i did are still fresh in my memories! i would gladly give anything for another go at secondary school and i would not change anything that i did the 1st time round!

at night, met up with my jc mates for a movie...wong kar wai's 2046! man it was a damn profound/arty farty type of show. saw many people fall asleep mid-way thru the movie. the movie has a very simple plot about this guy and his various relationship with different girls, yet the story has this very cheem feeling behind it that makes u stop and ponder.....ARGH dun even know how to describe it! suffice to say, this is not a movie everyone can enjoy!

sianz....booking in in 4 hour's time. and still got lots of things to do.....never could understand how i can stand myself for being such a last minute worker??

OCS

2004-10-22T23:13:00.000-07:00

well.....after 3 weeks of ocs, i'm finally back in civillization...
must say that the epxperience was not quite as bad as i thought it would be.... even though i got into alpha wing, which is suppossedly the most demanding wing in ocs.

going in to camp, i realized i forgot certain things, like my slippers, hangers, educational transcripts and shaver(not that i ever use one, just thati have to put it on display). somehow, i manged to beg/borrow/buy most of the items by the 1st week and settled to life in ocs. the training is tough man...imagine not running for close to 4 months and suddenly having to run 5km daily and in cadence with 41 other pple!!? luckily the spirit and morale of my platoon is quite high and i managed to push myself to complete all the training with them....

The more interesting things i wanna highlight in my 3 weeks stay in ocs are the chemical defense package, being locked out of my bunk and the dread "stress" position.....

Chemical defense --> we had to wear this stinking thick and smelly uniform that supposed to protect us from chemical agents in the event of a chemical attack... and to prove to us that it is indeed save, we were brougt to a smoke chamber in which we 1st wore our mask and did stupid exercises to prove its flexibility and dexterity. next, we took off the mask to feel the full effect of the gas without the mask as our filter and boy was it an experience... within seconds, your eyes start to water, ur nose clears and u start choking....after answering a few question possed to us by the instructors, we all rushed out of the room coughing and crying....it is one of those experience which is good to have but not nice to ever repeat again! and i mean ever again!!!!
Locked out of bunk --> my buddy and i had only one key to our room...so one day, while we were preparing to fall in, my buddy locked the door from the inside and proceeded to close the door. we each thought the other had the key and even joked about it. only when he locked the door and we run down the stairs that we realized to our horror that none of us had the key, had to inform our LTA about the incident and we were handed our very 1st extra duty the very next day.....but honestly, it was such a hilarious situation at that point of time that neither me nor my buddy cared about the punishment...
"stress" position --> this is a word all ALPHA wing cadets fears and dreads... it is essentially juz holding a 10kg bag with both arms straight out parallel to the ground....after just 30 seconds, your hand will start to shiver man...... and my platoon had to do it not once, but twice in 2 nights for all various reasons and boy can i tell u it was not fun at all man.... ur arms feels like they could juz fall off any time man......this is a punishment that all of us really fear and really pray that we would not have to use it that often.........

Wow, wrote quite a bit today......gonna spend the rest of tyhe time enjoying my weekend! gotta book in on sunday afternoon again.....sianz......

juz me!

2004-10-03T20:05:00.000-07:00

seeing that it is my 1st post, maybe i should do a short intro.......
i'm a 19 yr old guy currently working as a pilot trainee in the air force....
used to be from tao nan, dunman high and victoria junor college respectiely....
looks wise, i'm juz ur average joe...not too tall and not too short. not fat but also not skinny, if there ever was a word to describe me, i guess it would be plain.

well....currently packing my stuff in preparation for ocs tomolo....
and damn! i must learn to keep my stuff properly man...cant find everthing! from my stupid little dog tag that i haven worn since bmt 4 months ago, to my green socks and gutters!
hopefully when i'm done packin, there will still be space for my food stuff, 3 weeks of confinement is no joke man! especially without my snacks!!! and ya....hopefully staying in in ocs will curb my recent spending spree! spent close to 2000 quids on non-essential stuff, like a PS2, a remote controlled plane and a 2nd hand computer for my aunt......need to save money for something that i need, like a laptop!(really! i'm not buying it for gaming or surfing net, it will also be used for work related stuff especially when i begin my ground school in air force school) =)

but truthfully, not looking forward to ocs man...too used to civillian lifestyle already, 8-5 work days and the informal relationship between officers and their men....gonna be a total 180 degree change when i go ocs man.....juz praying that i can bear with it for the next 3 months and i'll be through!anyway, betta finish up my packing.....dun wanna forget anything when i go there.....the consequences is........